


Paradise

by Fandom_girl21



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angelcest, Angst, Archangel Feels, Azazel being sexy, Drama, Fluff, God's A+ Parenting, Non-canon canon couple, One-Shots, Perfect, Raphael angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-30
Updated: 2015-09-30
Packaged: 2018-04-24 05:12:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4906780
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fandom_girl21/pseuds/Fandom_girl21
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Raphael realizes paradise is closer than he thought.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Paradise

Raphael watched as Dean and Castiel walked away, the lightning danced uncontrolled around the room. 

How could he have been so stupid? How could he have let himself get caught?

Raphael fell to his knees, he stared at the floor, willing it to break, to take him away. 

A shadow came over him and he looked up, forgetting to mask his emotions, to keep them guarded. If any of the other Angels saw just how broken he was, they would run.

But it wasn't the eyes of an angel that greeted him. These were yellow eyes. Eyes that held so many emotions and so many memories that Raphael could feel himself fall... Fall into a sea of wheat, a pile of sunglow feathers, drenched in gold petals.

The demon crouched in front of him, careful not to be within grabbing distance of the archangel the fire held captive. The angel he remembered whose hands felt like a gentle breeze, whose smile could blaze out even the sun, whose laugh eclipsed even the mighty choir.

"What happened angel? You seem to be stuck."

Raphael looked away, forcing himself not open that door, the door of Before. Before the fall, before He left, before everything went to shit. 

"I'm fine, I don't need help from the likes of you."

Azazel rolled his eyes and got up. He looked around the room, and with a snap of fingers the chair Dean had been sitting in stood in front of fire. Azazel sat down with an exaggerated sigh.

"Lucifer revived me." Azazel said. Raphael didn't react, just as he knew he would. Raphael would never admit it but he was curious to know why. Why would Lucifer bother reviving a demon, a loyal demon yes, but he had many, many that would gladly help him.

But then Raphael thought about it, Lucifer must have known, even then, even when he tried to hide it from everyone, save father, what he had done.

It was Lucifer twisted way of an apology or the more sinister idea, to get Raphael to fall. To leave Michael alone.

Raphael made a move to scramble back and Azazel lunged, stopping in time before his hand hit the fire.

"He doesn't know, Raphi. I — I just wanted to see you. I had to, I meant what I said to then, I forgive you, I will not seek to intentionally harm you."

Raphael stopped and his eyes widened, he realized why Lucifer did it.

It wasn't an apology, Lucifer didn't want his forgiveness, or alliance. He wanted him to break, he wanted him to know he wasn't safe, that not even heaven could protect him from his wrath. 

"He took it away didn't he? He took away the connection?" Asked Raphael unconsciously inching closer.

Azazel nodded gravely.

"I did everything. Everything for him, left my brotherhood, heaven, you, for him. And when he brings me back he took it away, the thing that kept me from falling completely, my tether to the light... Why? Why would he punish those that are loyal to him?"

"He's punishing those that aren't, those that didn't fall, he's getting his revenge on heaven."

"Does heaven know?"

Know of Lucifer's vendetta? That Lucifer was seeking to destroy them all? Probably. It took Raphael a moment to realize that wasn't what Azazel was asking. 

Raphael shook his head, a small smile blooming in spite of himself, even with the apocalypse, even when heaven and hell were about to collide all Azazel was worried about was him.

"If Michael knows he would have sent someone." The unsaid being that if Michael knew there was a chance he was watching, checking Raphael's loyalty.

Azazel nodded. He understood. Michael wouldn't tolerate anything other than total loyalty. Lucifer and he were very much the same in that regard. 

Azazel's eyes flicked down to the fire ring, the very real and metaphoric barrier that separated them — holy fire, holiness in general, heaven and hell if you wanted to be specific. This whole thing just boiled down to a difference of opinion. A word, an argument made eons ago. An act that set in motion of chain of events that had led to this apocalypse. The final act. And all Azazel could think of how tired he was, how worthless this whole thing was, how stupid his decision had been in retrospect.

Azazel scooted further, till he felt the very edge of pain from the fire. Raphael hadn't moved, his eyes just watched him. He raised an eyebrow.

Azazel locked eyes with him and took a deep breath.

"Show me absolution Raphael heal me of my sins. Show me father's light again. Let me see my reward for renouncing the snake, and giving myself to God. Purge me of the darkness, so I may rejoin my brothers and sisters in heaven's glory."

Raphael froze, he looked at Azazel in shock. His mind went blank and his mouth opened and closed trying to find words. Only Azazel's unwavering gaze coupled with the absent of his smirk let Raphael know he wasn't joking. He wanted to come home, he wanted to be forgiven. A thrill of joy shot through him before he could stop himself. His nails dug into the wood floor, this was not his judgment to pass, this was not up to him. It was up to Father, but since Father was dead, the responsibility shifted to Michael. 

Michael. Raphael shifted at the thought, Michael might forgive him, but he would be watching them both, they would never be able as close as they used to be. But if by some miracle Michael did forgive him, Raphael knew it would be due to Father's will. That Father was indeed alive and listening. That he forgave them both. Dare he think that he even sanctioned their union now? 

Raphael looked out to see the beautiful moon hanging in the sky. The moon Azazel and he had explored together. Was it a sign? Did father forgive him? Was he even listening? Did Father deem them worthy of an answer?

One answer, one word, that was all Raphael needed to restore his faith, to rededicate himself to Heaven's original mission. 

Or was he supposed to not need his faith restored? Was he supposed to grit his teeth and go through with Michael's plan? Act like heaven wasn't straying farther and farther away from the mission. From the promise they made to their creator when they kneeled all those lifetimes ago?

At last Father spoke. The candles' flames climbed high changing from a bright orange to a beautiful sea blue — reminding Azazel of the first time he had seen Raphael fly in the sky. Then to a gray — when Azazel had found a piece of silver stone and made a necklace for him (which he still had hidden away from Michael). Till the flame finally changed to a brilliant black — the first time they had made love, among the hidden black of the night sky. 

The flame shrank and took on its original hue. Azazel grinned for two reasons. He was forgiven, and it seems father still had his sense of humor, showing them he knew, had probably known from the beginning and approved. Why else had he let it go on?

Raphael gently took Azazel's hand through the fire, flinching at the burn. Azazel looked at him in shock.

"Don't you want to go home? Don't you want to be free?"

Raphael shook his head, if they went home now they'd never be left alone. The apocalypse was looming and Raphael had so many things that had to be finalized before then, in case...

Raphael forced himself to stay in this moment, not dwell on the future. Father had given him a gift for his loyalty, he intended to enjoy his prize. Michael could make due without him for awhile. Besides the fact that no one had come to retrieve him spoke either to the fact that Michael wasn't paying attention or that he was giving him a break.

Raphael just wished he knew which one it was, he didn't really care. But he didn't want to have to explain himself later.

Raphael turned to look at the sky once more when he saw Monarch butterfly flit through the open window. Raphael smiled, there was none in this area, they also happened to be Michael favorite butterfly. 

It landed on Azazel's nose. Azazel and Raphael locked eyes, they both knew why this was here. The butterfly burst into sparks of light in front of Azazel's eyes. 

Raphael burst out in laughter. But Azazel wasn't about to make a move, not till he was sure. Michael wasn't father. He wouldn't forgive easily, would he?

Azazel felt his sword come to his side, invisible and ready to use. The sword he had had before he fell, before he had turned his back on the other Grigori. The sword Raphael had taken from him that fateful day in the desert.

Azazel smiled and clasped Raphael's hand.

Raphael pulled him into the circle of fire, Azazel sat facing him. They were alone, free, and together. Suddenly the fire seemed beautiful not sinister. The flames guardians against the world outside. 

Raphael smiled. He intertwined Azazel's hands with his own.

"Are you ready for absolution Azazel? Are you ready to see Father's light again?"

Raphael leaned closer, Azazel shivered despite himself. Raphael smiled wider, gently teasing him he whispered, 

"Are you ready to taste the glory of heaven?"

Azazel kept up the eye contact. He gently dragged his nails all over Raphael's hands. Eliciting a hiss from him before he could control himself.

Raphael rolled his eyes. Azazel chuckled softly at the faint blush appearing on his cheeks. His healer was still there thank Father. The angel that he had fallen in love with, the one that had kept him going, was still there. 

Catching Raphael's eye Azazel smiled widely.

"Yes I am ready for absolution. I am ready to be filled with Heaven's glory."

Raphael pinned him roughly to the wood floor and kissed him. He could feel Azazel claw at his clothes, kissing him with matched ferocity. 

Raphael's grace sang. Sang the glory of father, sang his praise over and over. With each kiss Raphael placed on Azazel's skin he thanked father, thanked him for giving him paradise.

Azazel's body was on fire. He had seen the stars when Raphael had kissed him. As Raphael kissed his skin, ran his hands across his feathers; Azazel threw his head back, his eyes closed — and for the first time in eons his grace sang. Sang songs of heaven, of beauty. Hymns of forgiveness, sonatas of light. Concertos of the perfection of Father. 

For the first time in eons Azazel truly understood the meaning of Paradise.


End file.
